Many of you know that I am an aspiring jeweller/actor/designer/writer/Queen of the Universe and the ‘aspiring’ part of that title requires me to have an actual job where I earn actual money. This job is teaching kids with special needs and I kind of freaking love it.
I’m a relief teacher so I tend to do the rounds of my local area and I was at a school today that just happened to have an auditor there. He works for the government and it’s his job to observe teachers and to keep them in line so to speak. This guy was a total knob. Technically, he was observing another teacher but he clearly thought it was way more fun to annoy me than to actually do his job. I said ‘Good boy!’ to a kid who did something good and apparently you don’t say that. Because you are rewarding the student and not the behaviour. Or something. What? Since when is a term like ‘Good boy!’ detrimental to the development of a child? Special needs or otherwise? I also pretended to be confused like one of my students when he was distressed that he couldn’t complete a task and apparently that’s babying him. It just got worse and worse until I said ‘Well done mate!’ and copped the wrath of why you can’t say that to a child with special needs. Because I’m not his mate, I’m his teacher and by calling him ‘mate’ I’m confusing the boundaries between teacher and student.
Dude. GET A GRIP! I’m an educated, intelligent, responsible adult who is well aware of my responsibilities as a teacher. I’ve attended the seminars, signed the forms and done the training. I’m not a kiddy fiddler. I’m also not a robot… and neither are my students. I will not be told that I cannot use terms of endearment with my students, I will not be told that I cannot give a student a congratulatory pat on the back or a sympathetic squeeze on the arm and I will not be told that these behaviours ‘confuse’ my students. I know how to draw the line if a student touches me inappropriately or for too long and I also know how to address these issues with my students without embarrassing them or making them feel awkward. I refuse to have a sterile, unfriendly environment in my classroom where my students feel that I am a stranger. I want them to know that my interest in them runs deeper than a paycheck.
I also resent being told that ‘as a woman’ it is far more difficult for me to make these boundaries because my ‘maternal instinct kicks in’. Oh wow, I seriously just got really angry reading that back. If you want to pick on someone pick on the teacher that’s reading a magazine while his degenerative/vegetative student is sucking on a toxic marker. Also, FYI, my students will ‘not lose respect for me’ if I jump on the trampoline. Go annoy someone else, little man, I’m good at my job.
What about you pie face? Any rants to share? Or an opinion on an a-hole manager? Or a discussion about how ridiculous the world has become when a teacher is told they can’t call a student ‘mate’?
Love Lady Smaggle
xxx
12 Comments
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um, firstly, WHAT A DOUCHEBAG. Ugh, how hard was it to refrain from kicking him in the junk?
I can relate to this, I have a new manager at work and he is seriously in my face, micromanaging like 99% of the day. UGH, I’ve been doing my job for nearly 3 years – I do not need constant supervision.
Maternal instincts! PLEASE. That’s like saying all blokes will have trouble working with any women because their penus-instincts will kick in. WHAT A DOUCHE.
(enraged on your behalf)
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I feel your pain! I worked for the Ministry of Education for ( . . . counting . . . um . . ) about 13 years (oh god I’m so old) and it IS like that! I used to feel that people wanted me to have a personality transplant. I just wasn’t enough of a sheep and I don’t believe in all the hoop-jumping. Now I’m still teaching (I can’t help myself, I just love it) but I work for myself as a dance teacher and I can hug and joke around with my students as much as I like.
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I totally get where you are coming from. I ran into an old friend in Myer about a year ago.
They also have a daughter (about 3 at the time) and she picked up a toy that my bub had thrown out of the pram. So I said to her “Thankyou Charlotte that was really nice of you”.
And umm well that was the end of the convo I was having with the mother, lol.
“We dont use praise in our house, we feel kids should do things without praise to make them better adults.”<<< Quoting from the mother..
Ok, yea different strokes for different folks but what ever happened to manners?
I thought saying thankyou was using manners and being polite ffs! -
Argh! how horrible.
I mean, seriously, the “good boy” vs say “good job” I can maybe MAYBE understand (but still, it’s being overly PC!) but to the maternal instincts comment? that would send me over the edge.
It made me super angry and that’s just reading it! How on earth did you respond? I doubt I could have kept my mouth shut. -
Today’s kids are going to be a very delicate breed of adults on account of some of the crap being touted by “experts” these days.
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Gigi – I know. I was so annoyed. But I just figured that he was such an idiot and clearly so wrong on every level that he wasn’t worth the hassle.
Nadist – It totally sucks doesn’t it? I mean it’s insulting that they think we don’t know how to behave physically around our students.
Meaghan – Whoa. That’s bizarre. I do get her point (I’m tired of congratulating kids everytime they do something really average) but to say that to someone is weird. Plus she’s like 3. How is going to learn good behavior unless she is praised for it?
Sarah-rose – I just nodded and smiled. I was actually kind of busy teaching the damn class so I didn’t have a whole lot of time to listen to his madness.
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Jay – Tell me about it. I shudder to think what’s going to happen to our world with them in charge.
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This is part of the bureaucratic nonsense that made me glad to leave classroom teaching. These tools don’t realise that by insulting the intelligence of the good teachers, they drive them out of the system, leaving our children with the dregs.
WRT the mother not praising her child, I think that poor child is going to start acting out in order to get a response from her mother. If she only gets attention for bad behaviour, then she’ll do whatever she needs to for the attention. Plus, hasn’t this mother ever heard of modelling positive behaviour? You using your manners will reinforce the child’s use of manners. In other words, monkey see, monkey do.
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Wowee. You sound like an awesome teacher! I can say for certain that the very best teachers I had were the ones who were relaxed, friendly, approachable and who acted like they enjoyed coming to work every day and teaching us. The teachers I hated were generally sullen, cranky and sterile. I had plenty of teachers who gave appropriate praise, joined in with games and were affectionate, and I turned out just fine!
I do worry about how the next generation of adults will turn out. Kids aren’t quite the delicate flowers that we imagine them to be. Sure, they need a bit more care and direction, but most of them are pretty tough cookies (until their parents start faffing around, refusing to let them play in sandpits and monitoring every morsel of food that goes into their mouths). As for that “no praise” thing…fuck that. I can only imagine the stories that young lady will have for her therapist when she gets older
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Not to worry, I’m sure there’s still plenty of bad parents like myself who insist on doing horrible things like praising our children and rewarding them for good behaviour!
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Wow! I thought I was the ONLY person who felt this way… I am a childcare worker F/T whilst studying to be fully qualified, and the rules & regulations re: children’s behaviour & the whole blimmin’ business gets on my nerves!
I got told last week that I shouldn’t use terms of endearment with 2-3 year old’s … (I said “oh honey, you’ll be okay, it’s not bleeding anymore” when a 2 year old busted her knee up & started crying) … but yet they expect the childcare centre to ‘feel like an extension of home’ ?!
When I get told things like that, I feel absolutely betrayed by the people we essentially work for – we’re being treated like 3 year old’s who don’t know the difference between right & wrong; while we are busy trying to teach real 3 year old’s how to be an intelligent, kind, decent person who thinks for themselves.
People are spending too much time imposing rules! Get a life!Personally if had children in care, as long as the workers are responsible adults (eg. described in your article) if they are forming a friendship with my child & caring for them 5 days a week I would be happy that the children are being talked to in such a genuinely caring way.
x Tasj
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I can identify entirely. I work in mental health and my patients know I am for them 100%.
I do not treat them as children. I do use terms of endearment like, mate, buddy, pal, darling as I would do with all of my family and friends. I congratulate them on their achievements and console them during the bad times. I get hugs and I give hugs. Ulterior variations are well recognised and de escalated.
They know – they really know, because they can tell better than a bloodhound – if you are in it for a vocation or just the paycheck.
My rewards never come from my micromanagers, I just wish that they were in earshot of my true critics, my patients. Then they would know the truth.
“The patient is the expert”
And to my managers – “See You Next Tuesday”! Big time and in your face. I’m so glad I’m not you!!!
