I am really, really, really pissed off today. This horrible little soul-less man that lives behind me has weird issues with us making noise. Daddy Smaggle’s four little sisters are visiting us this weekend (Mama Smaggle calls them the Coven) and for some reason everytime they are here his behaviour gets worse. Last time they were here he threw a rock over the fence that nearly got Mr Smaggle in the head and hit me on the foot. He is a very nasty piece of work. Anyway last night the Coven and the Smaggles and I were drinking wine and catching up and having a lovely time until around 3pm with our back door open. Obviously talking in your own living room is inconsiderate neighbourly behaviour. This morning we awoke to find two tires slashed on my car and two tires slashed on my aunties car. Our entire day has been ruined and it’s cost us hundreds of dollars and all because we were talking too loudly (in our own fucking house!) for the cranky old bastard over the back fence. We didn’t even have music going and there were only 7 of us. I have been resisting the urge to spray paint the c-word out the front of his house but this evil parasite has cameras all around his house to stop anyone seeking revenge for his disgusting behaviour. HE SLASHED OUR TIRES!!! And we can’t do a damn thing about because no one saw him. Sooo angry. He has done it to all of our neighbours as well and we actually get the least amount of grief so we should feel fortunate for that. But anyways tonight I am going to visit my friend Fliss because our gorgeous friend Heidi is over from England so I am really excited about that! And then I am having dinner with Mr Smaggle and some friends of ours. I hope I can let go of this anger soon because it’s really ruining my day…
* Black strapless dress from Ebay
* Brown plaited belt from BCBG
* Wood necklace from Diva
* Black bangle from Diva
* White butterfly ring from Diva
* Brown wedges from Big W
* White nailpolish! (I was a little scared about trying this but I quite like it. Very high maintenence though because it gets quite dirty)
Oh and just to lighten the mood I thought I would tell you that I got a message on my work and phone the other day that made laugh… This is what the message said ‘Hello this Jasmeet speaking I was wondering if you could give me some information about your English course. I have a degree from Cambridge University and… (another call starting beeping on her end) … oh would you mind holding please?’ and then hold music started playing on the message! He actually put me on hold in a message!
I do hope everyone’s weekend is better than mine! Feel free to share a weekend gripe if you have one. A rant is always more fun of you have company… or share a lovely weekend story to make my weekend more cheery! Either way, comments always make me smile…
Love Lady Smaggle xxx
9 Comments
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Yeah we called the police and of course they can’t do anything about it despite the fact that all the other neighbours have AVO’s out on him. Thanks for your lovely comments. And don’t tempt me like that Mr Squiggle…
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Two words: Today Tonight.
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That’s crazy – no wonder you’re angry. I hope you called the police and told them who you thought did it.
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Trust me it’s on the cards. I am plotting revenge.
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WHAT A DOUCHE! My immediate thoughts: dress up guerilla-style (balaclavas, combat boots, etc) and spraypaint the mofo’s house. It’ll be worth it for sweet sweet revenge.
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Well it’s my family home and we’ve lived there for 15 years. Plus we were there first. And he is only horrible to us about once a year. Its alright I have a feeling something really bad is going to happen to him. He has racked up too much bad karma to have a good life.
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man that really sucks! and i thought that the guy who lives above us was annoying, playing his television at the loudest possible volume at all hours so i can hear every word, constantly, was bad enough… considering the paper-thin walls & floors etc.
but your neigbourly experience takes the cake!
you should totally move out.
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Sally – Yes! I can’t wait for karma to come and bite my neighbour! I’m so glad you don’t have your nasty neighbour anymore they can really ruin your life.
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We have a shocking neighbour!
We live on ten acres of land about 15 minutes out of town on a dirt road and our neighbour likes to drive 20kms an hour along hour road….so she doesn’t get her car dirty!
Fair enough, but being in a family of 7 we are often late and this woman refuses to let anyone pass.
After several school bus chases attempts from Mum to reason with her everyone along our road got together and decided to scare her by calling the police!
She burst in to tears and told the police that the rest of us pressure her by driving too close etc etc etc.
So the policerelayed this conversation and told us if this kept up she’d have the right to take out a restraining order on us!
But about a month later she crashed her car trying to swerve a kangaroo and afterwards divorced her husband and moved away. Just goes to show that karma will never let you down.
