have a very complicated relationship with my hair. It went from thick and wavy to Electric Shock Tina Turner in the course of one year when I was about 9 years old. My hair changes almost daily but for most of my (very early) youth it looked something like this.
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Please excuse the weirdness of this photo. That’s my mate Jimmy and I have no idea what we’re doing but he is wearing a Care Bears back pack… is it a clue???
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Basically I had the world’s most giant hair. My hair is still on the larger side but this is what it looked like at the height of its power. I couldn’t use regular hair elastics because they would snap when I wrapped them around my ponytail. I had to use home-made giant hair bands made out of waist band sewing elastic to tie my hair back for school. Trendy right? Once I washed it and 2 pen lids fell out of it and I have no idea how long they’d been in there. Our pet budgie once got stuck in there too and my mum had to cut him out with manicure scissors. Poor mum used to have to wash it for me in the bath until I was about 12 years old because I didn’t have the arm strength to do it myself. She understandably got really tired of spending 2 hours brushing dead animals out of my hair every week, so when I was about 13 she made a very bad hair decision on my behalf.
My hairdresser had heard about this thing called ‘channelling’ that was supposed to thin out curly hair to make it less boofy. This basically meant cutting very thin channels of hair horizontally across my head, really close to my scalp and underneath the top layer of my hair to hide it. It worked brilliantly… on the first day I got it done. Then it started to grow out almost immediately and little fuzzy tufts of hair started sticking out everywhere. Curly hair takes FOREVER to grow because it forms in spirals which really slows the process down. It probably took about 8 years before I could tie my hair up without little tendrils of frizz popping free every couple of seconds. I used so much hair spray growing that disaster out, I’m sure I’m personally responsible for destroying the ozone layer.
Lesson? Never let your mother make hair decisions for you when she’s just spent 3 hours trying to comb a giant glob of toothpaste out of your woolly mammoth mane.
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Tell me… what’s the worst thing you’ve ever done to your hair?
Feel free to share a picture… I could do with a giggle today!
PS. Here’s what happens when I straighten my hair… it ain’t pretty.
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