Very Excellent Habits

Why You Shouldn’t Steal Cory Kennedy’s Style

I know this is a controversial opinion but I truly believe that Cory Kennedy is setting a bad example to the youth of the world. I am by no means referring to her underage drinking and partying, dating hideously inappropriate older men or even her use of the Paris Hilton Fame Principal by which one becomes a celebrity by doing absolutely nothing. Something tells me that American teens will do this anyway. Australians too for that matter. What I am referring to is her dress sense. Sure she is cute and waifish and quirky and generally looks acceptable but what upsets me is when girls start to copy her. It just doesn’t work.   

Observe the look of Miss Kennedy…

Looks pretty funky doesn’t she? I was picking these photos thinking ‘Why I am dissing her style again…?’. But it’s not her style I am dissing. It’s the fact that blind 15 to 22 year olds are copying it! And just quietly why is that person wearing green opaques with Nike trainers? Do you see the company this girl keeps?

Now please don’t mistake this fashion rant for a complete and utter hatred of the grunge look. I like to rock a little Courtney from time to time but I like to sprinkle a little of the dirt not pick up a bloody shovel and dig myself into a hole of filth. What I am wondering is when it became acceptable for girls to roll out of bed, not brush their hair, throw on whatever they found on the floor and then have the hide to strut their stuff like they’re fashion icons? From reading Cory’s blog I have discovered that her life is a series of parties and I strongly suspect she no longer attends school. Her lifestyle actually explains her look. Which is fine. And she pulls it off. This is also fine. But there are impressionable young girls wandering around your local shopping centre sporting her trends and looking well… really bloody ugly. Let me make my point a little clearer… Here is a picture of me wearing three MASSIVE Cory trends. A headscarf worn around the front of my head, mum jeans (or Mom jeans as the Americans like to say) and unwashed/unstyled hair. And just so you know I am only doing this because I love you..

My god. I didn’t even know that I had thunder thighs until I wore these jeans. And being the caring Smaggle that I am I decided to spare you all the photos of the dreaded camel’s toe. Was it something that women of the eighties just accepted? I mean were the hill-billy hitched up pants really worth suffocating your moot for? I mean this looks TERRIBLE on me. But at least I am willing to admit it.

And just when you think it couldn’t get any worse…

Holy moly. Look at that derriere. Quite impressive I’d say. Can I tell you a secret? I actually don’t have a really fat arse. I’m my father’s daughter and we were born without butts. Our cheeks just tend to blend into our thighs with out so much of a Beyonce bulge. I must admit I do have a little junk in my trunk but in the grand scheme behind-sizing mine is certainly on the mid to small end of the scale. Where the hell did that arse come from?

Cory has developed a niche look for herself and although it’s not entirely to my taste it suits her. If anyone can make an eighties reject Tweety Bird t-shirt look hip it’s going to be her. But what we have to understand is that someone like me who is at least 3 sizes larger and a good few inches taller than Cory will look stupid in what she wears. Well that’s pretty bloody obvious, look at the photographic evidence.

Are we convinced yet? Cory looks rather endearing in a street-urchin-on-crack kind of way but Lady Smaggle looks like ‘the bad girl’ guest star on 90210 with serious bum issues. By all means, experiment with different styles and if you want to wear arm pit gripping stone wash stove pipes then go for it and god bless you. But I beg you to wear them because you love them and love the way you look in them. NOT because Cory is wearing them. If you want to try the mum jeans go ahead. But if you look as jaw droppingly fugly in them as I do I beg you not to wear them. No one will think you are cool and you will just feel uncomfortable. Don’t do it to yourself.

Oh and just a side (snide) note… does this girl live in the gutter? Why is she always photographed sitting in the street or in the corner of some grotty looking bar? Would it really be so terrible to sit on a chair?

Your turn lovelies… What copycat disasters have you experienced? Are there any styles out there that really get your goat? Come on, I showed you mine…

Love Lady Smaggle xxx

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