This morning when I was driving to work, Cher’s Greatest Hits blaring through my Ipod, I was mentally planning my outfit for this evening. The questions I asked myself were rather frightening – Where is my Year 12 footy jumper? Are my tracksuit pants clean? Did I leave my slippers at Mr Smaggle’s house? One would assume that I’m planning an evening on the couch by myself but what I’m actually doing is going to my best friend’s house to eat dinner, drink wine, annihilate an entire block of chocolate and talk about life and love. Surely this requires a pair of jeans at the very least? Not so for us. For some reason we never EVER dress up for each other and we all know that not dressing up for me is like not breathing. This got me thinking… who do you dress up for in your life? And who do you not dress up for? And when? And why? Oh I do love a good fashion debate! Here’s a few important people or groups of important people that I have done mini-fashion profiles on to see what inspires good grooming in Lady Smaggle…
- Who? My best friend Loz.
- How often do I dress up for her? Never, unless we plan on appearing in public together which we rarely do.
- Why? We’ve been besties since we were 10 years old. I think once you’ve seen someone wet their pants or blow snot all over their face then all bets are off. Being friends with her has made me realise that true friendship is very unglamourous… but really, really beautiful. Also I think that we created a precedent for our daggy outfits back in year 5. We’ll always be the grubby little girls climbing trees and rolling around in the dirt.
- Typical outfit? Grey, baggy tracksuit pants, footy jumper, Daddy Smaggle’s Explorer socks and a beanie. We like to sit outside on chilly evenings, drinking wine and slurring drunken life theories. I would die of shame if ANYONE else saw me but I’m totally raw and neutral around Loz. Always.
- Who? My immediate family.
- How often do I dress up for them? Never but always. They just have to cope with whatever phase I’m going through.
- Why? I was raised in a very ‘open door’ household. We Smaggles have no secrets and in the Smaggle Castle, pants are optional. I never feel self conscience around my family.
- Typical outfit? God only knows! A turban, a silk dressing gown, 1980’s overalls, knee high socks, cargo shorts, evening gowns. The true fashion comes out when I’m at home.
- Who? Mr Smaggle.
- How often do I dress up for him? Most of the time.
- Why? I guess I’m just an old fashioned gal at heart and I like to be desired. We’ve been together long enough that I don’t need to impress him anymore but I generally avoid looking homeless when I’m around him. I think relationships only lose their magic if you let them.
- Typical outfit? A maxi dress, head scarf and bangles for lounging around his apartment. General spiffy attire for when we are out and about.
- Who? My crew.
- How often do I dress up for them? Always. Like my bestie Loz, we spend a lot of time drinking gin and talking shit but I always dress to the nines when hanging with my group.
- Why? I have some serious sartorial competition in my group. There’s Steph who dresses like a 1950’s bombshell. There’s Na who always rocks matching accessories and killer red lipstick and nail polish. There’s Tain who dresses like Kate Moss, Ted who does tomboy-cute like no one I’ve ever met before and Fee who has a pixie cut and sports the most divine of coats. One must really raise the fashion bar around these cuties.
- Typical outfit? Heels, funky skirts, unusual dresses, massive earrings, heaps of bangles. I also test drive most of my weird fashion items on these gals. They were the first to see me in the turban, my stack of antique watches, ankle socks with heels, the bright green eyeshadow… all which were met with enthusiasm. I love my ladies.
- Who? Work colleagues.
- How often do I dress up for them? Everyday. Although occasionally I will drag myself out of bed minutes before I’m supposed to arrive at work and on those days I look less than fresh.
- Why? Because I think it’s polite to arrive at work not looking like you crawled out from underneath a rock. Simple as that.
- Typical outfit? Pretty much what I wear everyday in my daily outfit shots. I have a pretty relaxed dress code so I’m not too crazy at work. I keep my puppies hidden and I try to keep my skirt at a respectable length but apart from that anything goes!
Over to you my pretties! Who are the people that you dress to impress? Who are the people who are privileged enough to see you in your skanky pants? Feel free to use my mini-fashion profile layout to share your thoughts!
Love Lady Smaggle
xxx
P.S I must add a disclaimer that I totally lose the fashion plot when I’m cold. Get me a moth ridden blanket, a poncho, a men’s dressing gown… I don’t care! I’d rather look like a quivering heap of garbage than be cold.