I’m not talking pleases and thank yous. These are obvious and mandatory pleasantries that should be automatic yet heartfelt. I’m talking about being polite in shops, on the roads and in restaurants. Here are a few practices that I think should be enforced by law through out the country. Punishable by death…
* Pay attention to who is next in line – and if it’s not you be gracious and let the next person in line go first. I don’t care if the shop assistant tried to serve you first. Just gesture to the person next to you that it’s their turn. I understand you may be in a rush but I think it’s worth those extra few minutes so that you don’t completely ruin someone elses day by jumping the que and having all that bad energy directed at you because someone thinks you’re a knob. Also I don’t want to hear that you didn’t know that person was next in line. Everyone is damn well aware of what number they are in a que. Be honest and classy. It’s worth it.
* If you accidentally cut some one off on the road just wave and apologise –This is goes for all road interactions. If someone cuts you off and they wave and apologise then bloody well wave back. We all make mistakes and if we were a little more forgiving on our roads it would be a much safer place for us all to drive. If a douche bag in a Torana speeds up and cuts you off without indicating while running a red light and playing 50 cent on their sub-woofer then by all means get horn happy and beep away. If a perfectly normal person does it and seems obviously apologetic just wave to let them know it’s okay. Don’t tail gate them for 20 minutes while continuously beeping your horn for the length of the parkway. Yes that actually happened to me and to be honest I’m still quite scarred… (Oh and just for the record I did cut her off. But I was in a new car and hadn’t worked out my blind spot yet. I waved and apologised and she turned into a psycho hose beast. Certainly not a gracious act on her part.)
* Wash your own god damn coffee mug– I friggin HATE it when people leave piles of crap in office kitchens. Everyone is correct in assuming that someone will wash it up eventually but how rude is it to leave stuff in the sink for other people to wash? I am guilty of leaving stuff in sink but I do the full wash up and shebang at least once a week. And if by the end of the day my cup is still in there I wash it before I leave. It’s quite simple really.
* Be lovely to sales assistants– Especially ones in supermarkets. Just a simple ‘Hey how are you today?’ is usually enough to get a beautiful smile and excellent service in return. I never even thought about this one until Mr Smaggle came into my life and I notice that he does this to EVERYONE! It’s really extraordinary because he gets people talking about everything from the weather to quantum physics and he walks away from someone after asking about their day and they are noticeably happier and lighter because of it. Try doing this to everyone who serves you today. You will feel spectacular I promise!
* Sing Happy Birthday in a civilised manner– I know I sound like the birthday scrooge but I am sick to death of gaggles of teenage girls screaming happy birthday to their drunken friends in restaurants. No one would be offended if they sang happy birthday at a normal level and clapped and cheered for an appropriate amount of time. But that ear-drum bursting screech that no one can talk above is just plain rude. If you want a four part harmony of dying Siamese cats to sing you to your birthday hell go ahead. Just do it the comfort of your own home and don’t subject the general public to your self indulgence.
Wow I do seem quite bitter today… but this post has lovely undertones and I do hope they are visible through my ranting!
Love Lady Smaggle xxx