If someone had told me a week ago that it was a good idea to pour a pot of salt water through one of my nostrils and out the other one I would have been all ‘Bitch please!’ *hair flick*.
It was much to my own surprise that I found myself doing that very thing this morning. Observe.
Now there’s a reason why I did this… and that reason is Morgan. She’s the yoga teacher and wellness guru at the retreat that I’m at in Bali this week. Allow me to introduce you to her.
She’s just about the most centered and pure individual I’ve ever seen. If I met her anywhere other than at a detox retreat in Bali, I honestly might not like her as much as I do. I’m totally fan girling over her. I will literally do anything she tells me to do. Which is how I found myself almost drowning whilst completely dry and standing on a patch of grass in the wee small hours of this morning. So if you see me Instagramming anything that seems totally bat shit cray just blame Morgan. That wiley goddess has cast a spell over me. I’ll follow where she leads. Just like in the Gilmore Girls theme song.
This evening as I tucked myself into bed at 8.30pm, (Oh, I’m a morning person now, haven’t you heard?) I started to research some of the weirdest therapies and health rituals. Since I’m in the detox frame of mind I thought I’d share a few of my favourites. Enjoy.
5 of the Strangest Health Rituals in History
Rebirthing Therapy
It’s thought that the process of child-birth can be extremely traumatic for some people and they may carry residual angst surrounding the experience. Rebirthing therapy is a guided breathing technique that helps people to let go of this trauma by re-living their birth. I personally cannot think of anything worse and I’m sure your mother would agree.
Bloodletting
Bloodletting was most commonly practiced in the 1800s and was supposedly used to help get rid of ‘diseased’ blood when you had a cold, the flu or even things like polio. Can you imagine giving blood when you’re delirious with fever? There’s a 100% chance that I would faint.
Maggot Therapy
This is exactly what it sounds like. It’s an ancient technique where you place maggots on an infected wound and they’ll just wriggle around and totally clean out the joint. Maggot therapy is making one hell of a come back because there are new strains of antibiotic resistant bacteria popping up everywhere and apparently the best solution is to get maggots to eat it. Fascinating.
Mrs Winslow’s Soothing Syrup
This was a charming little concoction that was sold in the 1800s and early 1900s for women to give to teething children to ‘calm’ them. Yep. Morphine will do that.
Bee Sting Therapy
Bees venom is thought to have marvelous anti-inflammatory properties and bee sting therapy has been used since ancient times to heal arthritis and sore joints. Of course now you can just inject the venom directly to the affected area, rather than endure the pain of 6 or 7 simultaneous bee stings.
It’s pretty easy to look at this stuff and think it’s a bit mental but sometimes I think some of the beauty rituals I go through are pretty weird. Imagine if you had never heard of these things before, how horrified you’d be that anyone would do them voluntarily?
* Teeth Whitening
* Fake Tanning
* Mud Bathing
* Bikini Waxing
* Hair straightening
* Botox
* Hair Perming
* Pore Extraction
Sometimes when I’m putting make up on in the morning, I stop and think ‘What am I doing??? I am literally colouring my face in. This doesn’t seem right.‘
Do you know what I mean?
What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever done for your health? Or better yet, what’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever done for your appearence?
Oh if you’re keen to follow along with my detox journey then just follow me on instagram (I’m @Smaggle) and on Facebook too.